Saturday, August 10, 2013

Laws of Probability

  • Law of Gravity - Any tool, nut, bolt, screw, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.
  • Law of Phone Numbers - If you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal and someone always answers.
  • Law of Mechanics - After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch.
  • Law of Variation - If you change a queue or traffic lane, the one you were in will always move faster than the one you are in now.
  • Law of being watched - The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act.
  • Law of Surface - The chances of an open-faced jelly sandwich, landing face down on a floor, is directly correlated to the newness and cost of the carpet or rug.
  • Law of Repair - When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will.
  • Law of Management - Anything is possible if you don't know what you are talking about.
  • Law of Bio mechanics - The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.
  • Wilson's Law of Marketing Strategy - As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop making it.